What's so damn wrong with me?

I thought I would have things "figure out" by now. Not all of them, but enough to live life without the constant feeling of "I don't know what I'm doing or I'm doing it all wrong". But, no. People seem to find themselves in a point of their lifes. I'm just as lost, if not even more, as the girl who wrote the first post on this blog years and fucking so many years ago. She had hope. 

I've live through trauma, I survive the most feared kind of pain... and if it changed me, it was for the worse. That make me really sad to realize it as I'm typing it. 

What's so damn wrong with me?

 

 

2024 - God help us all

My new years was pretty boring. Maybe by choice, I mean.... THERE'S ALWAYS ANOTHER CHOICE, but when you're dealing with PTSD, the safest choice seems like the only one. So I stayed home taking care of my pets, scared by the fireworks, drink a little, ate some dessert  (the one thing i was excited about it), smoke some weed... and feel asleep, 

My new year resolution,,,, it's to RISE. To let  myself be, like i said, i have this strong feeling in me, big things are on my way. Maybe it's a fat guy, maybe is a most fulfilling carrear. But it's coming. 

 

 

This was my look. All withe and shit.There's no such thing as too much peace. But, even before midnight i changed, cause i was already in the mood to stay comfy for bed.